My Wife Takes Zero Shit From Me

Published: 2013-02-27
 

I consider myself lucky to be married to a self-reliant woman who is not afraid to start a discussion whenever it is necessary. And to support me, whenever I need to rely on her.

To say it like a king:

I am married to a "self-reliant woman who takes zero shit from me or anyone else" (p. 150). Steven King

I am in the same situation. And I think this is great. Because we all are just humans. And we all make errors. And it is all too easy to say: "Shut up, I am right!" Temptingly easy. If you have a partner who responds to that, you are doomed. Because sooner or later instead of making up for a mistake, you will just ignore it—and therefore miss the chance to become better. Or you won't have the nerves or the patience or the persistence to discuss something until agreed, but take the shortcut instead and just demand it by power. Which, I think, is one of the reasons why power corrupts. If you want to become better, you need someone who you can fight with. You need someone who is not afraid to say "This time you fucked up!"

And if she was not self-reliant, if she was not independent (in every conceivable way: emotionally, materially, ...), then she could not do that. She could not be fully honest. Because she would not bite the hand that feeds her. So if she was dependent, she would be susceptible to blackmail.

Another reason why I think it is great my wife is independent, is that this way, she can also better support me. If she does not depend on me, then, sometimes, I can depend on her. If you would picture this, it means that we are not growing a single tree to which we both contribute, but two trees, who are deeply intertwined and support and hold each other.

Two trees intertwined A heart on the two trees
I'd love to read your response.
Mail me: moc.sthgisni-edamdnah@jrelsseor